On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize
