ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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