11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Randomize
