? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
