Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
