I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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