nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
