so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Randomize