I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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