She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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