I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
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