i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
nutella sex= disaster
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
