girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
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I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
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