So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize