I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
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