so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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