Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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