I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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