I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
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