I smell stomach acid.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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