how can u be prego again
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
organizing the empties. That sober.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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