Whod you bang
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
You did what with his pubic hair?
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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