I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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