Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
he just fucked me for my cheese.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
