There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
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