So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Randomize
