1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize
