I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I just saw a hot homeless man
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
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