im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Boobs speak an international language.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize
