last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize