I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
it's like iHOP with fire
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Randomize
