Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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