i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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