I'll bet she douches with gravy.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
