if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
