and my herpes radar will keep us safe
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
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