Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize