is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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