susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
