wat bout pragnant strippers??
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
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