Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
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I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
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