no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize