no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
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