It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Randomize
