I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
