Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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