do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
