I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Randomize