So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
