you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
