I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
It was like giving head to a cactus.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
